The Birth of Harper Jane Herbert

Friday, May 18th, 2012

5:30am - Well, I did not go into labor on my own on Thursday night.  Darn.  I was pretty discouraged by this when I woke up at 5:30.  Oh well, it was time to get ready for the day and head to the birth center.  I woke up and ate some breakfast-as much as I could because I was so nervous!  I also laid down on the floor next to my dog, Mia.  I know this is silly, but it is definitely something I will never forget.  She could sense something was going on, and just snuggled with me on the floor and comforted me.  Thanks, Mia :-)

7:00am - We arrived at Dar a Luz and met with Abigail.  Since I had not gone into labor on my own, I was semi-convinced that maybe I was just incontinent and had lost all bladder control!  Abigail thought this was hilarious and that I was definitely leaking fluid.  She had me do a test anyway, and the Ph strip immediately turned bright blue!  Bright blue = amniotic fluid.  Okay, time to get going then!  Since I had basically been officially leaking since about 12:30 the day before, we had 24 hours to get active labor started.  Meaning by 12:30 today I needed to be in active labor or else I would have to be admitted to the hospital-no pressure or anything.  Abigail checked my dilation and I was about 4-5cm.  She got me on the breast pump to ramp up my contractions.  I put the pump up to the highest intensity and the contractions started right away.  After 30 minutes on the pump, Abigail sent us out for a hefty one hour walk to keep the contractions coming.

10:00am - Got back to the birth center after our walk.  Contractions were definitely consistent, but just not strong enough and weren’t necessarily ‘sticking.’  As soon as I stopped walking, they would both slow down and also die down in intensity.  So, Abigail sent us out once more for another hour walk.  Oh boy!

11:00am - Got back from the second walk.  Feeling not so good!  Pretty worn out, and the contractions were more intense...but still not good enough to really be active labor.  We took a break for a couple of minutes.  Abigail suggested we eat something and leisurely continue to walk around the birth center.  At 12:30 she would check me again, if I still had not dilated anymore, she would manually completely break my water to try and get into active labor.  Luckily, Dr. Lehman at UNM had agreed to give us 28 hours, until 4:30, to get into active labor before I had to be admitted.  So, my mom came to the birth center with some lunch for us.  We ate and continued to stroll around. 

12:30pm - Time to get checked again.  Never very pleasant.  My mom decided to wait in the lobby to hear what my progress was.  Unfortunately, I was still only at about 4-5cm.  Ugh.  So, time for plan B (or C, or whatever plan we were on now).  I agreed to let Abigail manually break the amniotic sac.  This was quick and painless.  My mom left and we told her we’d be in touch.  At this point I was really beginning to lose hope.  I was dreading the news that we’d have to go to the hospital.  Thank goodness, this did not happen.  About 5 minutes after my mom left, I went full throttle into active labor contractions.  I was doubled over with pain almost immediately.  The difference between what I was feeling in the morning compared to NOW was incredible.  Abigail admitted us to one of the birth rooms at Dar a Luz so I could continue to labor in there.  She said she’d be back at 2:00 to check my progress.

12:30 - 2:00pm - For the next hour and a half, I writhed around in pain on the bed in the birthing room.  The pain was consuming.  I was unable to speak or walk or have any kind of control during contractions.  Not to mention, the contractions were coming one right after the other with no break in between.  This was not what I was expecting this “early” in my labor!  I did my very best to utilize the Blissborn techniques I had practiced.  It was really hard.  REALLY hard.  But, looking back, these techniques got me through this intense hour and a half period.  I was in a trancelike state.  Josh said that when I would open my eyes, I was definitely ‘not there,’ just looking hazily looking through him.  He attempted to comfort me with the partner work we had done with Blissborn, but I needed complete silence and no touching to focus and disassociate myself from the pain.  I would brush off any of his touches or words.  The only thing I said to him in this hour and a half was “wet washcloth.”  Which was the one outside stimulation that was comforting to me.  The internal monologue in my head was basically all Blissborn-telling myself it’s only temporary, telling my body to open and relax, using imagery of contractions massaging the baby out of the birth canal.  It was still very painful, unbearable and uncontrollable, but these techniques got me through.  

2:00pm - Enter Abigail.  Time to get checked.  Oh noooo-the last thing I wanted during this kind of pain is someone’s hand up inside of me!  Even worse, I was dreading bad news of slow progression.  I was panicking in my head at this point-if I’m only 6 cm or something I’m going to die, I can’t go on like this for any more serious length of time.  She asked Josh how I was doing, and he told her in a very unsure voice that he thought I was doing okay.  He really had no idea though, since the only words I had said to him were “wet washcloth!”  I first informed her that I was ready to get in the tub, remembering the healing and soothing powers of water.  She started filling it up and then came over to check me.  “Wow,” she said.  “How far dilated is she,” Josh asked.  “I don’t want to know,” I said, feeling that if I heard a number it would somehow psyche me out.  “You’re about to have this baby,” she said, “she’s 9 cm!”  Holy crap!  Talk about fast and furious!!  I told her that I was feeling the need to push.  She immediately called her birth assistant, Alyssa, to come in, but told Josh that she lived an hour away so there was no way she would make it in time.  She called her emergency backup, Lauren, to come in as well.  I remember her saying to Josh how surprised she was that I had progressed so far.  Since I wasn’t screaming or moaning or making any kind of noise at all, she was completely shocked.  I got in the tub and began the transition phase of pushing.  It’s absolutely amazing how the body just knows what to do.  The urge to push is unstoppable, primal, and as much as it hurts, it almost feels good.  It also feels terrible, but something about it is somehow ‘good.’  I yelled, and made noises I didn’t even know could come out of me.  Abigail and Josh both sat on either side of me outside of the tub coaching me.  Abigail encouraging me, saying YES bear down into that, and Josh telling me how good I was doing and how soon Harper was going to be here.  Around 3:00 Harper began crowning-aka: the ring of fire phase.  Once again, holy crap.  Intense BURNING feeling.  I kept chanting in my head “ICE,” one of the comfort techniques I learned in Blissborn.  I went very slow at this point, pushing her to one threshold of pain, getting ‘used to’ that level of pain, and then pushing again.  When her head finally came out, I yelled “help!”  Abigail told Josh to catch her underwater.

3:27pm- Harper Jane Herbert was BORN!  As I pushed the rest of her body out, Josh gently handed her to me underwater.  I lifted our most beautiful daughter out of the water and put her skin-to-skin on my chest.  Josh and I were immediately drawn-in to her and awestruck.  Wondrous!!  Happy Birth Day!

 
Aftermath- Phew, our little one was born!  However, right after the birth things got a little scary.  After delivering the placenta I began to hemorrhage and could not stop bleeding.  Josh sat next to me on the bed holding Harper as Abigail and the 2 birth assistants went into complete emergency-mode.  I received a shot of Pitocin in my right leg.  Not working.  They gave me a shot of something else in my left leg.  Still nothing.  Abigail was ‘massaging’ my abdomen to stimulate the correct bodily response as I moaned in agony.  Still nothing.  She suspected I had some blood clots in my uterus that weren’t allowing my body to stop the hemorrhage, so she had to reach in and pull them out.  Before she did this, she offered me a narcotic because it was really going to hurt.  At my pain threshold, I took it.  After pushing the equivalent of a mac truck out of there, it still hurt!  Finally, Abigail gave me some kind of enema of pills and this did the trick.  Hallelujah!  Having to make a trip to the hospital AFTER birthing naturally would have been awful.  I lost about 2 liters of blood and was shaky, feverish, and yellow after all the excitement was over.  Just so happy to have our beautiful little girl in this world with us finally!  But, I am currently on complete bed rest for at least 2 weeks in order to recover.  Since I have our little baboo here with us, nesting together in our quiet little cocoon for two weeks actually sounds amazing!  I can’t complain :-)  I have recovered very well so far, and mentally feel amazing.  May 18, 2012 was not at all how we had planned it!  But felt exactly how we wanted it to: May 18, 2012 was the best day of our lives.  Welcome to the world, Harper Jane Herbert!